Things have been a bit of a struggle lately. My depression has hit hard… Yet again. Things have fallen behind and been neglected a bit as a result. The good news is I am aware of it now. And now I am trying to focus on getting things under control again. That being said, it’s been a wild few weeks and I’ve managed to do a lot.
Starting on my first day at the new job, which is going GREAT by the way, I started going to the gym and getting my eating under control. I’ve started the process of losing all the weight I’ve gain since I moved out on my own. I have set the goal of reaching my goal weight by the end of the year and to get in MUCH better shape. It seems like a lofty goal now, but I will stick to this and it’s going to be a pretty amazing change come the end of the year. I’ve promised to take myself clothes shopping once I reach my goal weight. I’m also hopeful it will do wonders for helping me manage my depression and anxiety. I did have a nasty cold last week which put a wrench in things for a short period, but things are back on track.
In other news, I turned 30 a week ago on Saturday. Holy crap, I’m 30! It was a really amazing day; better than I could have hoped. I got to spend the day with my best friend and another old friend from high school who I haven’t seen in ages. We had a great time gallivanting about: we went to a local art store, we went out for lunch, we wandered around an office supplies store, an art gallery, and spent an excessive amount in the best yarn store known to man. Then we relaxed and chatted and caught up before we went our separate ways. I think it’s going to become a more regular thing. It was a lot of fun. Bestie and I grabbed a quick dinner at Wendy’s on the way back to my place. As she was getting ready to leave, I got a text from a friend who was supposed to be coming over, asking me if I was busy. I said I wasn’t and was just waiting for her to come over. She talked me into going out to a bar not far from my place because she had a “surprise guest” waiting there for me. I agreed, and Jess dropped me off on her way out-of-town to head back home. The special guests turned out to be some friends I haven’t seen in a couple of years, and it was so great to visit and catch up with them over a few drinks. Add some late night Burrito Boyz burritos and it was a pretty much perfect day. The next day, I spent the afternoon with my dad. We went for dinner at a great English pub, and then we went to go see Deadpool. It was my second time and my dad’s first. He got a kick out of it, so I’d call it a successful outing. Happy 30th birthday to me!
Over the span of my birthday weekend I acquired some new things, birthday presents, I guess they would be, even though I bought some of them myself. I have a few new books to read, a new colouring book and pencil crayons, some new candles, some new journals (of a couple different natures: a Moleskine journal and a Wreck This Journal!), and a new video game: The Witcher 2. I have played it for a few hours so far, and those few hours went by SO fast… I can’t wait to keep playing. Hopefully, a bit this week. I hope to write a bit more about the game in the near future. I just want to get back into the routine of posting regularly again first. That, and play more than I have.
Now, back to the job. I am about to start week 4 at said new job, and so far it is going very well. I have met some great people, the hours are treating me well, and the workload and difficulty of the work isn’t too far from what it was at my old job. And for more money. So, all in all, it’s great! Changing jobs was an excellent decision for me. I enrolled for my benefits with this job last week, and I also enrolled in an RRSP. Guy! I have retirement savings started! I adulted so hard and I am so proud of myself. It’s not much just starting off, but just the fact that things are started makes me breathe a sigh of relief. At least the ball is rolling now.
As you can see, it has been an eventful few weeks, all while struggling more than usual. I did a few things to help myself through as best I could. I will continue doing what I can to help myself pull out of this rut. This weekend I managed to clean my apartment from top to bottom and get things under control at home, and I’ve spent a lot of time relaxing by way of colouring. It has definitely helped, in combination with the gym and generally taking better care of myself (as much better as I can manage…it’s still by no means exactly what I need). I’m not where I’d like to be mentally, but I can say that I am doing much better than I was even a week ago. I just need to continue making positive progress. And with the way things are going now, I will.